The last few weeks, I have been having some really crazy dreams.  Some of the dreams are funny, some strange, some really scary, and some very realistic.  Let me tell you about this retarded one I had last night. 

I am in a recovery program called Living Well.  It deals with my past, the root of the problems(control, fear, co-dependency…),  and then spiritual maturity.  Well my dream took place in my group at Living well.  My mom, dad, and old mentor, and another girl I knew from way back were all in my group.  This is odd because none of these people would EVER be in my group, but they were all from my past.  It was my time to do my life story and I began reading what was supposed to be all about my life from my perspective.  I was reading what turned out to be this long report on Calvinism,  Catholicism, and who knows what else.  I burst out crying when it hit me that this story was not about me at all.  I still had shame of my past.  I didn’t mind the new people in my life that knew me as the God fearing person I strive to be hearing my story.  I just didn’t want the people from my past hearing all the things that had been done in secret, especially my parents.  This is where the dream gets comical.  My facilitator was trying to reassure me that I needed to get all this out when my dad walked up to me and said….”have you checked on Weeza?(my boston terrier)”  I had no idea what he was talking about.  Then he said, “Justin Timberlake shot her…she’s at the vet’s office.”  I jumped up and ran out to call and check on her. 

I have no idea at all what the dog  part of the dream meant.  However, I think that God is trying to reveal things to me in my dreams.  Not all my dreams are spiritual, but I believe with all of my heart some are spiritual.  I know I tend to be busy and don’t hear God’s voice.  He  may just have to speak to me when I am still and asleep.  I now realize that I am still dealing with some shame from my past.  However, the fear I did have at one time to face it and deal with it is not there.  I want to be completely free!!  I want to live that life of ABUNDANCE that God has promised.  I want to live in Canaan!